Announcing New Search Engine!

. Computer genius Iam Savvi announced his new Internet search engine, Giggle™. Savvi claims some of the improvements over competing Internet finding aids include establishing an extensive list of 'stopwords'.

. "Most search engines ignore words like 'the', 'of', ' in' and the like. But we have programmed our search engine to ignore hundreds more, so Giggle™ runs much faster than competing services. Of course people need to be more thoughtful and precise in their choice of keywords. But isn't that an improvement of the intellectual atmosphere in the world?" he opined.

. "We don't want to be finding any webpages that are depressing or boring or unhappiness-making, so this affects our choices of stopwords, like "violent", "calamity", "harm" et cetera," said Savvi, an informal guy who asked us to use his nickname "Savvy".  "They are saying 'Everything is in a name'. Good for the business, too!" he quipped. Savvy avows an interest in making Giggle™ a truly international service in token of which he has adopted the following mottos for his company:

. "Quid pro quo, vere. Sed tamen qui est quid?"

. "Tanzen und singen, die Frühling zu bringen."

. "Es muy macho a decir '¡Viva yo!' "

. "Le roi des poissons? C'est en effet le Poisson d'avril!"

. "Talking and reading, please dear customer, that is how we are doing business," he says from his small office in Varanasi. "Yes, we are telling you truly how up to date we are. You see, our city was called Benares. But going back to the roots is so 'in' now so we readopted the original ancient Sanskrit name Varanasi. Isn't that so frightfully good thinking?"

. When asked how he was able to start up his company so quickly, he replied: "Oh yes, we are being very thankful to the gracious workers at our call centers for working so cheaply. You see, India is now so prosperous that labor costs are flewing the coop, like right over the Himalaya!"

. "But we were able to be establishing our user assistance call centers cheaply, in poorer countries. Presently we are having one in Millinocket, Maine and another in Detroit, Michigan. Soon another is being set up hastily in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and right after that, another in Riverside, California.  The town fathers and mothers of Cambridge, Massachusetts are trying convincingly to have us set up a call center there, too.  (It is very tempting, as I have heard that those talented, but poorly paid citizens, have among them capability to speak 123 languages!)  Isn't that so very nice? We are having agreeable partnerships with America! This makes me very happy, to make friends in the other hemisphere. I feel so totally global now, just right for this modern age, yes?"

. "Being desirous of a representative Asian opinion we looked for someone with a broad perspective. When I asked for a comment on Giggle™ His Humbleness the Dalai Llama was kind enough to explain." Savvi quotes Him as follows:

. "Wherever I go, my main interest or commitment is in the promotion of human values such as warm heartedness – this is what I consider the key factor for a happy life at the individual level, family level and community level. In our modern times, it seems that insufficient attention is paid to these inner values. Promoting them is therefore my number one commitment. Therefore, it's important to use the good potential to be a happier human being. That is what I found so beautiful about Giggling."